I ain't gunna be no one's appetizer

The Humboldt Squid

There is an alien intelligence residing deep within the Monterey Bay, a bizarre life form that appears to be proliferating by the thousands in cold black waters far below the surface. It resides within creatures that have three hearts, primate-like stereoscopic eyes, blue blood and brains large enough to suggest they are among the smartest creatures on earth. They are giant raptorial predators with a taste for flesh. Growing up to seven feet long and occasionally bigger—possibly much bigger—these carnivores seize their prey with two lightning-fast, hook-laden tentacle clubs, draw it into a squirming nest of eight arms and proceed to tear chunks of flesh from its body with a disproportionately large, razor-sharp, parrot-like beak.

They are notorious cannibals. They have been called the most opportunistic killers in the sea. They have been observed employing cooperative hunting techniques, yet they will not hesitate to gorge upon one another should they sense the slightest possible opening. Although they primarily hunt fish, they have been rumored to kill and eat small mammals, even dogs. They will attack anything over which they sense an advantage, including humans. Divers recount breathtaking beatings, painful lacerations from their sharp hooks and even incidences where, working in teams, these animals have dragged divers into deeper water to subdue them.

They are Dosidicus gigas or Humboldt Squid, the fiercest of all the cephalopods, and for reasons unknown to science, they are appearing in huge numbers along the West Coast, from the Gulf of Mexico to Southeast Alaska, including a sizable population right here in the Monterey Bay.


The Humboldt squid is capable of changing colors several times a second, from the deep maroon that prompted Mexican fisherman to dub them los diablos rojos, or “red devils,” to an opalescent white. They have been observed pulsating like jittery strobe at each other, principally while hunting or feeding, a behavior that some researchers theorize could be some form of communication.

There is just too much information to post on these squid. And now they are in California. Granted one will probably not be playing in the waves of a beach in Oceanside, it's still a scary thought. They have been reported to attack prey in a "gang bang" style. And during a special I watched on some Discovery Channel type program, a group of smaller Humboldt squid caught some prey (large fish I believe) and drug it down to a much larger squid. The lack of light at this depth didn't allow the camera to capture more than the reaching tentacles, and the galre of an eye. But with the technology we have today the researchers were able to calculate that the hidden moster was about 120 ft long.

Let me repeat that: 120 freaking feet long!

To the group of 6ft Humboldts you are probably going to be a nice meal for a group of buddies. Like a plate of ribs, or a holiday ham to split between family members. But to Mr 120 Feet you are nothing more than an appetizer. At best.